Andrew and Ashley VS Parker and Chester | THE NERDAGON

 

“We all make mistakes in the heat of passion” - Hugh Neutron


(Thumbnail by Mediocre Productions)


Andrew & Ashley Graves, Cannibalistic siblings trying to survive a capitalist dystopia.


Parker Hajiaskari & Chester Beckington, Investigators for hire of Life Of Luxury.


As much as it sucks, every bond has a smidge of toxicity. These pairs? Yeah… bit more than a smidge. We’d give you a subscribe button to hit if you joined The Nerdagon in this DEATH BATTLE!


Before We Begin

In terms of the content we will cover in this blog, it’s fairly short for the siblings. We are going to be looking at The Coffin Of Andy And Leyley in its entirety, all endings will be analysed as there isn’t a definitively set “canon” ending (Partially due to the fact the game isn’t finished). None of the endings have major differences in their stats or arsenal. Therefore, we consider a soft composite to be fair game.


For the Life Of Luxury side, we’ll be looking at the main channel as well as LuxuryDark and LuxuryReacts, formerly LuxuryLight. There are two other channels, LuxuryPranks and LuxuryShorts, but those will not be included. LuxuryPranks is an older, inactive channel that follows a very different type of content and doesn't reflect the characters that we see on the main channel today. LuxuryShorts is, of course,a channel focused on posting short form versions of the videos on the main channel, ultimately resulting in no content we wouldn’t find on the main channel. Long story short, these channels don’t really contribute to Parker & Chester as they are today, which is the primary source material for this blog.

Background

Andrew & Ashley


 


”It’s all about Andy with you. Well guess what? Andy is dead”

 

“…You’re right. I really don’t like Andrew.”


Many years ago, a fifteen year old Renee Graves gave birth to a young boy, who was named Andrew. Two years later, a daughter came along, named Ashley. The teen mother struggled to balance education, work, and her children, but Andrew was very responsible for his age. Since the boy could handle his sister, it would make everything so much easier… Right?


The Graves siblings did not live a good life. Whether you look into undiagnosed mental issues, parental abuse in mental and physical regards, early interactions with a demonic entity, or simply the confusion in growing up alone, something sent them down a deeply flawed path. The brother tried his hardest to keep his sister safe and sane, even if it meant going to extreme lengths to please her. Anything she wanted was to be realized, anywhere she wanted to go, anything she desired which could be afforded, any time she demanded, and sacrifice she required. When Andrew was roughly seven years old and Ashley was roughly five, they took their first life. ——, a young girl that had a crush on Andrew, would become the first in a long line of victims. The siblings locked her in a dusty box overnight, and asthma handled the rest.


Some say trauma connects people, perhaps that’s true, though the Graves siblings couldn’t have escaped each other even if this turned out to be completely false. A parasite warning reached their apartment, and a quarantine was ordered. Their blood was taken and further news would reach them soon, surely… 


Yet months passed. Day by day their resources ran dry, until the wardens stopped delivering food to the room. No matter how they rationed, it grew more and more hopeless. The two could hardly stand, and days went by in their desperate bids to conserve energy. The quarantine now risked more than a pause on the future, now putting a strain on more than relationships. A happy end would never come, as the siblings were, unbeknownst to them, legally deceased pawns in an organ harvesting scheme. They no longer lived in a home, they lived in a coffin. I’d love to tell you a shining light came through to save them and offer a new lease on life. But I must be honest, and remind you that not every story has a happy ending.


Hope did arrive though, in the shape of the cultist next door. A shady neighbour that constantly put aggravating music on, attempting to summon a demon. The attempts eventually paid off, and a mysterious entity was summoned, which allowed the cultist to escape the quarantine. The escape was death, as the entity simply took his soul, but that’s why you make your desires specific with the occult. The corpse now sat alone, what a waste. All that meat would simply rot. That’s enough beating around the bush, desperation changes people, so the siblings cut the cultist into pieces and ate parts of his body. 


Realization hit Andrew hard, the wardens would find out and it would get linked back to him. His life would be over, assuming there was a life left to end. The warden was on his way, so Ashley cleaned the cultist's apartment. The warden walked in, found Ashley, and Andrew’s hand was forced. This was the end, the home was too deep to escape. So they dug deeper. Andrew led the remaining warden to the room, Ashley summoned the demonic entity, and their roadblocks were swiftly dealt with. Escaping the apartment complex led the two to a life on the run. They sold most of their belongings and found a motel which didn’t ask for identification. Anything to survive, after all.


Ashley’s trinket gave her a prophetic dream, a strange man would slit their throats as they slept. Along with Andrew, they shot the mercenary where he stood and took his car. Anything to survive, after all.


They found themselves at their parents' new house, a building paid for by the insurance claimed in their ‘death’. They needed money, so they’d take some. Anything to survive, after all.


Ashley wanted more, she wanted revenge. They tied their parents up, gave their souls to the entity, chopped their bodies into pieces, and ate them in a stew. Anything to survive, after all?


Ashley wanted more prophetic dreams, so they found a random family as they camped and gave their souls to a demon. Anything to survive, to survive, to survive against what exactly?


The child ran off, that was a risk. Andrew slashed the young life into pieces. It was to survive, so he and Ashley could be safe.


Ashley wanted to work with the entity, in spite of Andrew’s warnings. But she wanted to, so it was fine, right? Anything to survive, after all.


Anything Ashley wanted. After all, if she just got what she wanted, everything would be easier.


Right?

Parker & Chester


Little is actually known about the backstory of Parker & Chester. We know that Life Of Luxury as a channel was formed in 2017 as a followup to the LuxuryPranks channel. Ever since then, Parker & Chester have been taking investigation requests out to the middle of nowhere to find stalkers and monsters alike. After years of doing this semi-successfully, the LuxuryDark channel was made, and the two of them now live together, driving out to the middle of nowhere and buying the sketchiest black market products money can buy.


Chester also insists on sleeping with Parker whenever they stay the night at a client’s house, showcased by him pushing twin beds together so they would be side by side but that’s unrelated.

Skill/Experience

Andrew & Ashley

Despite their unfortunate circumstances and mental states, the two are surprisingly adept at survival, with the 2 of them being able to survive for 3 months inside their apartment with barely any food. Ashley in particular is gifted in this field, capable of deducing the intentions of Mr. Washing Machine, a trained hitman hired by a prominent corporation. She notes (correctly) that he’s hiding in the motel room closet awaiting and ambush, comes up with a plan to lure him out of the building, and figures out out to open up an opportunity for Andrew to find him. 


Outside of that, the 2 of them are no strangers to mental games. Andrew was able to successfully lie on the spot when he was discovered by 2 cultists by pretending he was one of them. Ashley is a whole other beast in this category though. She’s manipulated Andrew for years, coercing him into killing their parents, cannibalism and even convinced Andrew to kill Nina when they were still children… Only to then blackmail Andrew afterwards by threatening to expose his actions if he didn’t remain her friend. Needless to say, she’s crazy, but absolutely devious.

Parker & Chester

Being in the investigation business for around 6 years, Parker & Chester have picked up a few skills. They are remarkable cameramen, routinely setting up cameras to keep track of the supernatural.

Equipment

Andrew & Ashley

Lighter

Many years ago, when Andrew was a young boy, he found a lighter in an abandoned house, right next to an ashtray filled with used cigarettes. Perhaps this experience wasn’t the reason for his liking to tobacco, but the result remains the same. Andrew is a smoker, and always has a lighter on hand to light cigarettes, candles, or whatever else may need fire.

Cleaver

Originally belonging to the cultist next door, the kitchen cleaver was a necessary tool to chop the corpse into manageable pieces. Far outside this initial necessity, the duo always had the knife on their person. Whether it kills a warden, ends their neighbours, finishes off their parents, or takes the lives of troublesome children. Andrew is the most skilled with this, and though he’s far from perfect at the craft (Notably failing to take down Mr. Washing Machine in direct combat) most who find themselves on the other end of his blade don’t live long enough to take advantage of any inexperience. 


He also cooks with it!

Gun

A revolver that the wardens guarding the apartment complex kept on hand. In death, it found a better use. The gun is useful, putting down Mr. Washing Machine, threatening Renee and Douglas Graves into submission, or simply offering some comfort in a cruel world. The amount of ammunition given to the weapon varies. As it could be considered empty under the assumption the Andrew emptied every bullet into the hitman, or be considered nearly full under the assumption that he didn’t.


In the aim to utilize the siblings at their typical best, the gun will be assumed to be full.

Entity’s Trinket

After sacrificing the warden to a demonic being known as ‘The Entity’, Ashley was given a strange talisman.


As described by The Entity, the item allows Ashley to peer into the future through her dreams. This has shown Ashley visions of a hitman killing her and her brother, as well as various instances of Andrew attempting to (often succeeding) to kill Ashley.


The Trinket also allows The Entity to locate Ashley without the need of summoning runes, music, or even specifically candles.

Car

After killing Mr. Washing Machine, a hitman sent to finish off the runaway siblings, Andrew and Ashley took the keys to his vehicle.


The car doesn’t have any special properties, it simply takes the siblings where they need to go and at times gives them a place to sleep. Andrew is the only one with a license though.

Parker & Chester

Car

At the start of every Life Of Luxury video, we see the duo driving to their destination. We also see them retreat to it at the end, driving away from the scene of the investigation.


Security Cameras

Another signature of the investigators. Around the first conversation with the client or monster sighting, the two will set up security cameras to monitor what’s going on in the buildings they visit. The amount they carry is unclear, but it is usually four given the cameras shown placed. The cameras come with night vision features to see in the dark, but this feature is somehow capable of portraying an invisible imaginary entity, as seen when the imaginary friend, which the two couldn’t see normally, was clearly visible on the cameras.

Handheld Cameras

When on the job, the two will usually carry two cameras on hand to record anything they find while walking around. These cameras sometimes have lights when filming in dark areas. Parker’s camera in particular comes with the night vision feature of the security cameras that allows him to see the imaginary friend.

Smartphones

Parker & Chester both have smartphones that they typically use to monitor what happens on the security cameras.

Laptop

Parker has a laptop that he uses to read emails from clients, check the cameras, and complete all sorts of Dark Web transactions.

Sunglasses

Chester’s pair of sunglasses that he is rarely seen without, to the point of having them at his bedside to wear at a moment’s notice. They should act as standard sunglasses, protecting him from blinding and small projectiles to the eyes.

Hammer

Used to board up windows and in a RAID ad segment, Parker & Chester have a hammer on hand to hit something harder than average.


Abilities

Andrew & Ashley

Tar Soul

In this conversation with the demon, the concept of Ashley’s soul being offered is shut down by the demon. Outside of being called ‘Tar Soul’ by said demon, Ashley is clearly rotten enough to the core that even a being of death and trickery doesn’t want her soul.


The demon isn’t picky with morality either, as it happily accepts the soul of a warden (Who was perfectly fine with starving the quarantined occupants unless they paid with their bodies, or so is heavily implied) and the Graves parents (Who were willing to declare their, very much living and clearly scared, children as legally dead for financial gain). 


 Grime Soul

As confirmed by Lord Unknown, an ancient demon of incredible power, Andrew is a Grime Soul. Grime souls have the possibility of ‘hatching’ into Tar Souls, which demonic entities take great interest in.


As a Grime Soul, Andrew shows a unique advantage over the rest. When Lord Unknown peers into his mind, the boy is capable of hiding his true memories from the demon, even if it is briefly.


Andrew is also capable of locating Lord Unknown as it peers through his memories.


 Cannibalistic Nature

Yes, this is serious.


The human body has an innate instinct to fight against cannibalism. With this being said, Ashley lacks any reaction against consumption of this tainted meat, despite even her brother having this reaction at first.


There are certain explanations that could answer this. Perhaps Ashley simply lacks that factor, though the closest look into her body make-up would be said brother. Perhaps she has experience, but that’s never been shown. Finally, given that cannibalism is frowned upon within the Coffin’s world, ancestral immunity wouldn’t be a reasonable assumption.


Under these notes, the closest result that can be reached here is that Ashley is capable of asserting an increased degree of control over her own bodily functions than that of a regular person.


Parker & Chester

None Of Note

Support

Andrew & Ashley

The Entity


The Entity is a demonic being that was summoned by Ashley back in the apartment. Little is known of the true nature about this being, but we are certain of a few things.


The Entity is a non-corporeal being, having shed its human body long ago (long enough for the flesh to have completely decayed at the very least).


It consumes souls, and is capable of stripping the souls of those offered to it incredibly quickly. Once someone’s soul is taken, they aren’t technically dead, though are left in a vegetative state, never to be properly ‘living’ unless their soul can be returned.


It can only exist in the human realm when summoned. While initial summoning requires runes, candles, and music to get The Entity’s attention, someone who has a talisman or ‘mark’ from The Entity only needs a circle of blood and some degree of fire to be summoned in.

Parker & Chester

None Of Note

Feats

Andrew & Ashley

Overall

  • Survived and successfully escaped their 3 month quarantine 

  • Summoned a demon

  • Sacrificed multiple people to said demon, including their parents

  • Defeated Mr. Washing Machine, a hitman out to kill them

  • Evaded consistent police presence

  • Sent Twitter into a meltdown 

Power

Andrew:


Ashley:

Speed


Andrew:


Ashley:

Durability

Andrew:


Ashley:

Parker & Chester

Overall

  • Semi-successful paranormal investigators

  • Amassed a 9 million subscriber following

Power

Parker:


Chester:

Speed

Parker:


Chester:

Durability

Parker:


Chester:

Scaling

Andy & Leyley

Nothing Of Note

Parker & Chester

The Monsters

Seeing as it’s part of the job to investigate these things and they have survived several attacks and consistently outran these beasts, we will be scaling Parker & Chester to the monsters they interact with physically.





Weaknesses

Andy & Leyley

The Graves are not perfect people, their relationship is not perfect. In the stress of life and death situations, most people would have arguments. In a large portion of potential interactions, the Graves go beyond simple arguments.


Both Andrew and Ashley have resorted to physical violence against the other out of anger. Andrew has gone as far as killing Ashley at times.


For as many instances there are of Andrew and Ashley working together well, there’s a brutal argument or two between them.

Parker & Chester

 

The investigators have their fair share of limitations and shortcomings. The one that would come up most notably during a battle like these? Well, to put it bluntly, Parker & Chester are REALLY dumb. Parker has a habit of denying any sort of danger in environments that are known to be dangerous to them, like when he tried to pass off the giant hole in the floor Chester found in Kathryn’s house as a result of the house being old and insisted on staying another night to record the monster despite knowing they were the next targets. He has also intentionally purchased a 20 pound spider that was shipped with a chain on the box and a biohazard warning… and decided to open the box with no hand protection. Chester, on the other hand, is prone to giving the monsters he finds ample time to initiate an attack and regularly leaves himself open, like when he was staring down a puppet that was moving entirely on its own and stood there as it rushed toward him. He also doesn’t know what roman numerals are or what a skull and crossbones symbolize.

Before The Verdicts

Do Ashley and Andrew Canonically Reset After Death?


There are several ‘bad’ endings in the Coffin, typical for a horror game. Be it death, imprisonment, or simply a life led down a dead end, not every path sees salvation.


Usually this would be the end of it, but a few factors do open up a deeper discussion.


If Mr. Washing Machine kills the siblings, a special ending scene is achieved. The two main factors to note are Ashley’s drawings of the event, and the voice in the background directly mentioning a redo. Now the voice could be chalked up as something speaking to the player, though the player isn’t a factor mentioned within the Coffin. Perhaps the pictures were drawn before the events, though we see no colouring materials within the chapter. Still, it's too inconsistent and easier explained as a joke should this be the only case.


However, this is not the only case.


The Happy Ending has the Graves die to police gunfire, with a drawing that couldn’t have been made and similar comments about ‘trying again’


The ‘Andy in A Box’ ending features a similar drawing and ending dialogue. Now the drawing can be explained here, Ashley has plenty of time, not so much for the dialogue


The ‘Prophecy Fulfiller’ ending features, once again, a drawing and ending dialogue. Ashley is dead, thus can’t draw, assuming she stayed dead [Content Warning: Self harm is present in this ending]


The ‘Graves in A Grave’ ending features the drawings and dialogue. Note that the dialogue specifies ‘Buried you in a grave’. The player is not being buried, Andrew and Ashley are


The ‘Deadest of Dead Ends’ ending features the drawing, though the ending dialogue is different. The dialogue mentions retries, and makes the implication that they could be granted, though says that there’s no point given how screwed the siblings’ have set things up to be [Content Warning: Self harm is present in this ending


To play devil's advocate:


This gives us little to work with ultimately.


There is a consistent theme of impossibility with the drawings, distinctly in Ashley’s style, even when the situation makes Ashley drawing them impossible for a typical person. 


There are direct mentions of retries, second shots after a death or dead end is hit, though they are offered by something or someone that isn’t the siblings themselves. Targeted pronouns such as ‘you’ are utilized pertaining to events specific to the siblings, specifically Andrew, and not the player.


With this, we have a consistent theme of a force offering Andrew, and by proxy Ashley, a chance to try again when they make a mistake or hit a dead end, unless the mess ups are so catastrophic that there’s no way to fix it.


Do We Agree With This Notion?


Short answer; no


Long answer; ultimately, it’s not that there isn’t a shred of viability, but it relies far too much on implications to be valid. Who’s the force? The Entity didn’t know them when the warden caught the siblings, and while Lord Unknown mentioned that it promised to ‘Always be there’ for Andrew, though it’s important to note that this isn’t directly confirmed, only implied.


The pronouns and wording used implies that the siblings are being spoken to, though this, once again, leads into implications.


Perhaps once more content has been released, and we learn some deeper aspects of the series’ occultism this theory may have some standing. Until then, the Graves remain quite grounded, though slightly supernatural.


Deciding Between Routes

One of the primary draws of The Coffin is the various routes within the game. Even initially innocuous choices can lead to not only a different ending, but a completely separate set of events than other routes. Choosing whether or not Ashley shoots Andrew in her dream, picking up a secret ring, and how much faith the siblings put in each other all offer routes with unique charms and versions of the Graves.



Burial: Starting with one of the primary paths in chapter 2, Burial is the result when Ashley and Andrew put their faith in each other.


After killing their parents, instead of a somber and quiet butchering, the two have a generally enjoyable time. They joke around and hold contests over the skulls of the people that once ‘raised’ them.


There’s a slight divergence within burial, with the aptly named ‘Sane’ and ‘Insane’ routes (Otherwise known as the ‘friends’ and ‘lovers’ routes) which have minor differences, and will likely lead into different storylines within chapter 3B.


The Graves work with each other at their arguable best within this section. 


That being said, given that Burial lacks a chapter 3, it will not be considered for this blog.



Shots and Such/Deadest of Dead Ends: This is the strangest mix of routes within chapter 3A. The arguments between Andrew and Ashley lead to an active chase with the threat of Ashley’s life.


The Graves are lucky to be alive next to each other here, and everything has effectively gone the worst it possibly can. Ashley isn’t a partner to The Entity here, she’s a slave. Andrew’s an alcoholic alongside his smoking addiction. The only endings are the two dying in front of school kids, or getting married to each other for convenience.



Andy in A Box: This is a simple route. Andrew gives up on fighting, he decides that simply submitting to Ashley is the best option.


This route wraps up nicely, though has a small issue in the reality that the Graves live in The Entities realm in this ending. 



Cliffhanger: This is the route that has arguments of being the ‘most canon’, as it’s the only route in chapter 3A that doesn’t have an enclosed ending.


In the cliffhanger route, Andrew and Ashley don’t get along very well. They have disagreements consistently, get into physical altercations, and end up split up as the route goes on.  


Though this has the benefit of being the ‘most canon’ route, the Graves are not actually together by the end of it.


Considering all of this, using any route wouldn’t be inherently wrong, but to find a general middle-ground as well as use an ending where the siblings are both together and in the human realm, we will be using the Graves from ‘Shots and Such’.


House Shakes Of Luxury

The most contentious part of Life Of Luxury scaling is the house shakes performed by various monsters. The shakes themselves are fine, they happen pretty blatantly, but the matter is of Parker and Chester scaling to it. In We Bought A Clone From The Dark Web, Chester survives an attack from Parker Junior before it runs off into the night, with Parker Junior shaking the house enough to knock paintings off the wall a few seconds prior. While there is no blood or physical damage shown, Chester states that he was attacked and is hurt, which would align with Parker Junior’s threats to take his skin and that tonight was the night, so he was explicitly trying to kill Chester in this attack. Given that Parker Junior is also a clone made from Parker’s tainted DNA (tainted as it was mixed with Apollo, their dog), we believe it’s reasonable that he should also scale to it, given he is generally physically above Chester. In His Imaginary Friend Comes to Life at Night, the titular Imaginary Friend begins headbutting the wall, also causing the house they are in to shake. His attack on the investigators is even more blatant than Parker Junior’s, with him slamming Chester into a wall and strangling him. After recollecting himself, Chester appears to be perfectly fine. Ultimately, we find that these feats are consistent enough to count, and the two should scale in durability to these feats.

Verdict

The stats of both are pretty simple. Starting with the Graves siblings, they should be stronger, with Andrew’s boulder pushing being a bit above the best showing from the Luxury side, that being Parker’s door kick. Seeing as the boulders that Andrew pushes are portrayed as around his size, pushing them should eclipse Parker knocking down a frail wooden door. The speed  of the siblings also reaches the superhuman ranges, with Ashley’s sprint across the kitchen being ~16m/s at the minimum and Andrew scaling. Parker and Chester… really don’t have any speed feats. They are often caught by the monsters in the chase without pulling obstacles to slow them down. As for durability, this one goes to the Luxury side, with Chester being able to take hits from monsters that can shake entire houses, like Parker Junior. In terms of the stat trinity, the Graves seem to edge out.


Despite how close stats are, the real game changers are equipment and hax. In terms of equipment, the Graves are our clear winners. They have more potent weapons, as well as more weapons in general. Parker and Chester really don’t have any answer to being run over or getting shot, especially when Ashley is far more likely to go for these actions than either of the investigators. For the hax side, it’s another win for the Graves. The Entity thoroughly outclasses anything Parker & Chester have ever faced, much less have at their disposal. They have no defense to having their souls stolen, as neither have any defenses to such an attack. 


Finally, we reach the crux of this MU: intelligence. With how close these two are in stats, outsmarting the Graves might save the Luxury duo. Can they take intelligence? In short, absolutely not. Andrew & Ashley should outwit them at every turn, with Ashley in particular being a master of manipulation. Not that she needs it, as Parker & Chester have shown plenty of times that they will ignore danger, needlessly risking their own lives and can’t really do anything if Ashley decides to settle things with a quickdraw.

Summary

Andrew & Ashley

ADVANTAGES

  • Faster on foot

  • Significantly more bloodthirsty

  • Far more cunning, strategic, and intelligent by a wide margin

  • More skilled in direct combat

  • More effective weaponry (Look at this gun I found!)

  • A better range of innate abilities

  • The trinket offers a peek into the future…

  • Their souls show innate resistances to various spiritual powers…

  • The Entity is powerful enough to end the fight immediately…

  • The game 


EQUAL

  • Even speed with cars


DISADVANTAGES

  • …But the visions cannot realistically appear in this battle

  • …But Parker and Chester don’t affect their souls in the first place

  • …Though summoning The Entity relies on the usage of environmental factors

  • Less durable, with their own AP (outside of the gun) failing to close the gap

  • You know what they did (Mr and Mrs Graves are very, very bad people).

Parker & Chester

ADVANTAGES

  • More mentally put together

  • Better teamwork on average

  • Higher durability…

  • Car outclasses most of the siblings’ arsenal in terms of power…

  • So stupid that they’re unpredictable

  • They aren’t related, so you can ship them morally

  • Sick ass Parker Junior edit


EQUAL

  • Even speed with cars


DISADVANTAGES

  • …But not durable to tank a bullet

  • …But they don’t use it for combat

  • Unbelievably unintelligent

  • Parker could deny really obvious danger

  • Chester is consistently prone to letting the enemy attack before acting

  • Did a Raid Shadow Legends ad

FINAL VOTE


Team Graves (3) - AdamTheMango, Aktoruk, Stationsearcher

Team Luxury (0) - we still subscribed ;)

Team Parker Junior (2) - Mediocre Productions, Necryo

NEXT TIME…

 




End Note

This is something of a starter blog for the Nerdagon, serving as a small package and entry point before hopefully moving onto bigger things.

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